What I'm really thinking

Anyone who knows me even remotely would know what 'The wonder years ' means to me.
Its like my food. I cant live without it and as they say, you don't know what you have until you lose it, it couldnt have occured to me more clearly.
At the risk of sounding extremely melodramatic, I'd like to let you know that the past week has been sheer torture for me. Zee cafe folks have stopped airing my most favorite of all tv shows and its like slow posion for me. Okay they do air it in the morning sometime, but i'm not a morning person , unfortunately.

Not being able to watch wonder years for like 7 days made me realise how much i was into it. And seriously, I've learned hell lot from that show. Its like been an ongoing life lesson for me. I know it's so kiddo -like to let tv shows become a major chunk of your life, but for some inexplicable reason, I've become attached to wonder years and I dont seem to let go.Its more like epiphanic for me.

I guess I always identify with Kevin, how he responds to situations is so much like I do. The whole pleasant torture from an overbearing elder sibling, the high school heartaches, the mom relationship, the best friend living next door thing, its just all so strikingly similar.

This just reminds me of the fact that how weirdly aloof my life is, before this it never occured to me that my existence is very narrow. Being away from family for a long time has taught me a lot of things unknowingly , the most major one being living my own life alone without being involved. I have realised that slowly and gradually , I have made possible that all things that i depend on are non living. I do not want humans to matter to me so much, its this innate sense of vulnerability that i have. I like 'staying away'.
Anyway, without getting into un-pleasant details, I'd just mention, that stuff's been working for me all right and I love being the person i am. i guess some of us just live through life depending on stuff like ..umm..tv shows?

This is my most adored picture of Kev-Win and ofcourse, I always feel all "awwy" whenever i look at it. :P
I stil cant get over the fact though, that kevin and winnie didn't end up together. I guess you really never know what happens with relationships. They're so random and fragile. One blow can kill anything, they gotta be handled with super care ,but , as everything else in life, this too, we learn after all the damage is done.



There is this quote from the show which is narrated while the junior high school prom is going on with " unchained melody" playing in the background, its become one of my favorites,here you go, read it :
"All of our young lives we search for someone to love. Someone that makes us complete. We choose partners and change partners. We dance to a song of heartbreak and hope. All the while wondering if somewhere, somehow, there's someone perfect who might be searching for us."

PS .I know.
My sis says "Get a life" too . :P

PPS. For all you fellow star wars buffs, theres this uber cool online journal I found which is pretty awesome. A good read. Try it out.