"That's the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria!"

Have u ever said something u really wanted to and then realise what a gruesome mistake u've committed?
let me explain...I'm one of those people who are just not able to say what they want to...i have always wanted to be able to be mean to people who 're incredulously mean to me and guess what? today i was. i was able to say the exact words in the exact phrases at the exact time i wanted to. and now i feel tortured. this always happens to me...when i say what i wanted to..i end up torturing myself...i feel terrible.i feel like a horrible person. if only i could go back in time and undo everything i did.I've decided ..I'm not gonna try and tell people what i want to. its just not my thing.wonder how some ppl can just be so brutal and rude and get away with it?

anyway...today has been an exceptional day otherwise...my part of the world has good weather, and nice windy breezes...and a slight tint of sunshine..just the way it should be...and there is no downpour ..just the hint of it...again, just the way it should be.
on my usual stroll today in the park, i finally was able to get rid of my fear of insects and held a butterfly in my hands for a fraction of a minute.
it was pure magic. i was delighted. the velvety feel of her wings and the titillating motion that it was up to... as if trying to tell me something.


i am intrigued by butterflies...they are all the same but each one unique...they are the only species so close to us human beings..we 're also all the same but each one of us is unique..they say there is always exactly one more person in the world who looks like you..wonder if I'll ever meet my twin? actually i don't want to..I'd rather believe I'm the only one blessed to look like me. :P

I've also discovered that out of all the places i like...i adore bookstores...the ones in which u can sit and read for hours ...not the ones in which the silly ppl shove u out if u stick around loitering...
bookstores are the best thing that happened to man. to me at least.
there is something so enchanting about shelves and shelves of books waiting to be read . my ultimate fantasy is to be able to own a house and have a huge library with bookshelves extending unto the ceiling. pure happiness.
i have this theory according to which our books choose us. we don't choose them.
each book knows what kind of a reader it wants and so sub-consciously when we enter a book place ..our mind leads us into te passages where our destined books lie and we end up selecting them out of the millions of books available.
isn't there something so mysteriously fascinating about it? this is the exact reason why i feel books are our best friends..they talk to us! and like all other friends..books also "choose" to be with us. I'm so ecstatic to know so many books like me..cz i keep ending up in a bookstore more often than my allowance allows!
my mother refuses to give me money cz she's aware I'll spend it all in a bookshop!
well...the book lord chose to endow me with all the precious friends...i pity the people who don't like reading.... they miss out on so much! but then it's not their fault, books don't befriend them.
pardon me for sounding un realistic..but i have my moments! when i choose to live in a fairy tale.
and i have no regrets!

i found this extremely amazing song...which so exemplifies the state of mind i have right now . its from the movie "the wizard of Oz". try to love it...
here are the lyrics:
over the rainbow:
http://www.reelclassics.com/Musicals/Wizoz/rainbow-lyrics.htm
if u want u can soothe yourself by followin the link and listenin to it yourself:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2A2Jt4WOxN8.

happy weekend people!
i hope u have it as beautiful as u want it to be.
:)